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Thank you so much for posting another chapter.
Poor Liz, wanting so despretly to be loved by Ted. What was in her head? Did she have any idea how futile her efforts were? I’m taken by how low her self worth must have been. Putting up with all his crap before there was even any connection between Ted and the murders. Staying with him after she suspected he was involved with the murders and then after he was charged with kidnapping! Wow! I would be very interested in her reflections on that time in her life so many years later.
Thanks for posting! I could see being in that confused state Liz is in. It is easy to get confused when you’re in love and only want to believe the best about your loved one. Still knowing what we all know it is maddening. I too would love to hear what worldly-wise older ‘Liz’ would have to say to the world now.
Love the chapter.
Not sure how I feel about Liz though, she just doesn’t sound 100% truthful. It seems to me that she is remembering things in a way SHE prefer to remember. ..
Thank you for posting another chapter!
Will you post a follow up- I think perhaps I noticed what you meant, but I’m not sure if we’re on the same page! The parts about Ted sneaking off during errands definitely stuck out as suspicious. Did he not want to be seen? Did he want to get away?
I’ve been thinking about Liz and the way she wrote this book- how she still speaks with so much love about him and their life. It confused and frustrated me as well, until I took the time to think about the timeline itself. This book was published in 1981. She started dating Ted in 1969, and they were very close for six years, and were off-and-on even after that. The first chapter notes that even in 1976 she still wasn’t sure whether or not he was guilty. It took a long time time- almost five years- for her to decide and accept that he was guilty. After a nearly ten year long relationship, I guess it might not be that surprising that she is still conflicted at the time when she wrote this.
The good still might have seemed to outweigh the bad in terms of years, and people were still trying to decide just how many women he had killed. His motives weren’t well understood either.
I think that in 1981, she probably still missed the good times they spent together. She was probably still a little lonely, a little guilty, and a little sad. So maybe then, she did want to show that he loved her. Maybe she wanted something to redeem him, or maybe she wanted to justify her own relationship with him (like, “yes I was dating a killer, but see how much he showed me that he loved me, THIS is why I loved him,” etc). I wonder- and sort of hope- that as more time went by, she was able to reconcile and accept what had really happened. I wonder, if she published something now, what would she say? Would she write more about all of the little things that seemed off or suspicious that she had overlooked, or maybe things she had remembered or realized? Would she have become stronger and braver, and maybe written encouraging other women to trust their instincts, and to stay away from men who lied and manipulated? Perhaps it would’ve been more of a cautionary tale than a tragic love story.
Shudder at her continuing to sleep with him. And interesting, if a little misguided, that she thought he was killing the girls because they looked a little like her. Incredible how he continued to use her right until the end. He must have been an absolute charmer – creepy.
This is the worst chapter so far IMO. Liz shows her own evil with flying colours. This woman was so desperate for this mans attentions that she was willing to turn a blind eye to the fact he was a killer. Then she flatters herself wondering if he targeted women that looked like her? Sorry but Liz deserves no sympathy, not after this chapter. Think of the risk she willingly subjected her little girl too. Liz knew what Ted was and she got some sort of buzz out of it too, somewhere inside her she got her high out of thinking she was the only woman in the world he would never kill because she was so ‘special’ to him. Liz was sick, and bad herself. It’s one thing to have a hard time breaking it off with a serial cheater, it’s a whole other ball game when you keep a serial killer in your life. Lock her up.
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